A Successful Expert But Not Feeling Your Big Purpose? Reason #1

So, what do you do if you’re like my colleague-friend–an expert with a successful
business–and you want to feel that you have a BIG PURPOSE, but you’re just not
feeling it?

If you’re feeling ho-hum, and not called to anything particularly meaningful, or not meaningful enough for you, I can almost bet
it’s because you aren’t connecting with the right audience.

The one you’re currently working with is either too broad (a
huge issue for so many experts/service providers!!) or simply
not the right one.

You need to know, who has the pain that you most want to
heal
? Not the pain you are dealing with now, but the pain that most galvanizes you when you think of soothing or eliminating it. Perhaps you are working with too superficial a pain right now—or an audience whose level of pain doesn’t enable you to do your greatest work.

Or look at the aspiration you most want to help people fulfill. You may simply not be calling your current audience to reach high enough. Or you may need another audience entirely who has higher aspirations.

My Big Purpose is to change the world by ensuring that you, visionary leaders, change the world. I am very clear that I am here to help that population, and the
recent change in my business identity makes that abundantly clear. I am speaking to
a very select group of experts now—those who are visionaries and want to change the
world. I narrowed my already narrow market. And I did it because I had to for my
own growth. I was feeling that something was missing—I was feeling uninspired–and I
realized that I was getting bored with what I was asking of them. I didn’t need to change
markets, as you may, but I needed to call them to higher aspirations—to satisfy my
own soul.

And, luckily, my desire to call them higher coincided with what was happening in the marketplace: millions of service-based entrepreneurs waking up to a desire to be part
of something bigger. And I knew I was the one to help them.

Knowing my skills and talents went a long way to firmly establishing my Big Purpose.
But I’ll delve into that in my next post. For now, I want to emphasize the importance
of your audience in feeling your own purpose.

You are here to effect change. You wouldn’t have chosen your profession otherwise.
And you do have a purpose—and I firmly believe you have a Big Purpose. If you’re
not feeling it, take a hard look at those with whom you’re working now. In some way,
they are not igniting your spirit. Either call them to something higher, heal a deeper
pain, or change to an audience who wants either or both in direct proportion to
your passion
for either or both.

Be sure to get on next week’s call: A Time to Lead: Do You Dare?

UPDATE:  A relatively new client of mine wrote me the other day because she was
noticing a lag in her excitement. “I have moved away from “life interests” and into
more of a “business” market and am questioning what I am doing and why– forgetting
that it simply doesn’t excite me thinking about working with HR or executives to
bring my offering to them. It actually gets me to an icky place of,  “Why bother?” I’ve
looked at our work so far and see that the only thing that needs changing is my target
market! Now, it is feeling GREAT!!”

Purpose is entirely linked to your target market!

The Final Corral: The Secret to Being an Inspirational Speaker

There are those who speak with an academic purpose. They
have information that needs to be conveyed.

There are those whose purpose in speaking is to get a result.
A process must be implemented; a change in behavior needs
to occur.

There are those who speak to present a revolutionary idea.
TED talks are famous for this.

And there are those whose purpose is to produce all three.
But without this single element, they’re not likely to succeed
at any of them: Inspiration.

What is inspiration? A dictionary definition is, “Stimulation
of the mind or emotions to a high level of feeling or activity.”

I would remove both uses of the word “or.” One is not
inspired if the emotions are not stimulated. So, to convey
information; to get a result; and to present a revolutionary
idea, the audience must feel. And there’s no point in
inspiring if there is no new activity.

So, as the leader of the room, it is essential that you feel.
How do you evoke emotion in yourself around your topic?

Ask yourself, What is the most influential, far-reaching
impact this topic can have?

If you are not getting there, you will not feel the emotion
that, in turn, inspires.

I was working with a successful, international speaker last
week on a new topic. We were circling around the one he
has been giving for years. But as I listened to him,  I knew
it wasn’t engaging him as it should. I knew it wasn’t deep
enough. And I knew that was because it wasn’t addressing
the farthest-reaching impact this speaker could produce. I
asked him, “What final corral are you herding your audience
into?
” (By no means did I mean that to be derogatory; it was
simply a visual device I knew would get at the answer that I
wanted.)

I wanted him to see that his current topic had a deeper end-
result
than what he has been sharing. There is an ultimate
corral for them that he has not been moving them into. His
current topic was causing him lethargy because he was only
“herding” them into an intermediary corral; it was only going
so-far…but he didn’t realize that was a problem of any kind.
He didn’t know there was corral beyond! It took our session
for him to see that he wasn’t going far enough.

His topic has been on diversity. I asked him, “What is ultimately
possible if a corporate team accepts one another’s differences?

He said, essentially, that they would be able to “do more as a
group.” I won’t say more about what we came to, as it is now
turning into a proprietary signature talk for him–but what he
saw was that he was stopping too short in the process and as
a result, was not speaking about a topic that was his truest
calling, his truest purpose
. As a result, it was causing him to
be stopped short in his passion. He saw that he needed to design
a talk about the “final corral”: the potential of a group.

His voicemail the next day made me laugh: “Guru, Lizabeth!
Master, Expert, Brain-Sticky, Inspired Leader, awesome
Lizabeth! This is one of your most devoted fans. Thank you for
drilling down to what I am SOO passionate about, that I didn’t
even realize was there!”

In order to “stimulate the mind and emotions to a high level
of feeling and activity”
—you must do the same for yourself
first. And that will come only when you are speaking about
the “final corral.” It may be very true that you, like my client,
are stopping too short, and short-changing your audience and
the results you could get.

As an Inspired Leader, it’s time to come into your own, and
drill down to your core-most purpose for being on a stage.
Ask yourself, What is the most influential, far-reaching
impact this topic can have?

Be sure to join me on my free 90-minute telecourse next
Monday: Secrets of Impact and Influence: The New Paradigm
of Public Speaking. It’s not your typical free teleclass!
www.bit.ly-sii-teleclass

#7/8 Session with 2 Financial Coaches Today: Selling from Stage!

In this 7th session, we tear the lid off the definition of consulting!
I give Mike and Mari an all-out script of their signature program.
I tell them exactly what to say to move their couples into the all-
important “ick” (remember the Transformation Arc?) that will
allow their audience to make a shift right in the room. And I give
them exact words to say to teach their “Brand Concept”—the
secret communication cycle.

We strip away all vestiges of Old Paradigm didactic teaching styles
—like speaking with lots of “periods” instead of mostly question
marks; telling far too much–and dive into ways to fully and
consistently engage the audience and gain their rapt attention in
the “New Paradigm.” For instance, the “ick.” One of the M’s gives
me his plan for disseminating the information about the cycle—
and I tell him, “You’re giving the punch-line away. There will be
no learning if you tell them what the cycle is without their first
experiencing it for themselves. They need to have a breakthrough
before they’re given a solution.”  That is just one of tons of insider
secrets I give them on delivering this new material powerfully.

Then, we delve into their offer-from-stage—how they’re going
to share their next paid program with the audience at the end of
the free seminar. M, who will be presenting, is concerned about
looking “sales-y,” though he knows selling is a necessary part of
the process. I help him to see that, in truth, with no manipulation
or “spin,” they are actually giving their audience a gift. M&M
want to invite them to a 1-day event that will reinforce the new
communication techniques the couples have just learned, but
also get them learning the hard-core tools of repairing their
financial situation.  For this “older and wiser” couple to offer
this at a special “at-seminar” price is a gift for these younger,
direction-less couples.

To help M&M see this, I take them through another psychological
exercise for determining the VALUE of their program—so they see
that whatever price they offer for this 1-day is a steal…because
the seminar is so immensely valuable. Too many people “price” the
wrong way; they start with a price they believe the market can bear,
instead of starting with the value their market will get from their
expertise.  So, we do this together: enumerate all that the young
couples will be saved from by attending this full-day program.
There is a lot of juicy information about selling and pricing in the
last quarter of this session.

And today you can hear it all! Today this 8-CD set goes on sale!
I’m so excited. Be sure to watch Video #2 here now and go get
your copy!

Session 2 of 8 With Two Financial Coaches Who Want Clients

In the first session, M&M and I looked quite deeply at their
target market. What would be the natural next question?
How do you reach them? I call these your Touch Point 1
venues
. Lucky for me, I didn’t have to convince M&M that
speaking is hands-down the best way to connect with a
market; they had already done some speaking.

So in this session, we delve deeply
into this subject, again gathering
data and building upon it. Where
have they spoken before? Where
could they speak that they’d never
thought of, and which are the three
most effective venues? We decide
that to attract couples, they would
reach out to churches, libraries,
Barnes & Noble
(they could ostensibly
speak on Dave Ramsey’s book), and
local boards of education to see if they
promote workshops for parents.

From there, we begin to touch on content. What have they
spoken about in the past? Well, their previous topics have
been rather dry, focused on how to budget and reduce debt,
so I draw us into thinking about what would be most Brain-
Sticky
. To determine that, we must know who would be in
the audience (target market), and what would get them there.
So we need to understand the Trigger Event (see yesterday’s
post) and their market’s most acute pain, and of course
M&M’s special solution.

I advised them that this time, they need to give more than
just an information-based seminar. In this day and age,
I told them, you want your audiences to be transformed
in some way, right away. And you do that by taking them
through what I call the “Transformation Arc”: this is a certain
trajectory that guarantees a powerful shift in thinking and
very often a shift in behavior.  This “arc” begins by getting
their market immediately into the ugly emotion they deal
with (even unconsciously) every day. I call it “getting
them into the  ick.”

The male “M” of M&M, who has done all the presenting in
the past, is unsure of this direction. He has always worked
with audiences in what I call the “Old Paradigm,” where
he hauls out a Power Point (aaaaggghh!) and didactically
transfers knowledge, without much engagement with those
in the room. I point out to him that in order for his audience
to be moved enough in this  free “portal” talk to then buy
a service package with M&M, they must FEEL—and you can-
not tell someone to feel; you must set the stage for them to
experience emotion themselves. This, and only this, creates
transformation in them, and a far stronger interest in
buying.

Next, we need to solidly determine what the “ick” is for their
particular market. What is the emotional sludge these
couples are wading through, as it pertains to their financial
struggle? Well, in the next session, three, we hit pay dirt!
Together we figure this out and with that knowledge, we begin
to sketch out the Brain-Sticky concept of their portal,
signature program
…that could become the differentiation
for their entire business! Be sure to come back tomorrow to
see what it is!

As for you: is speaking on your list for strategies to get
more clients and build your list? What Touch Point 1 venues
will best reach your market? And what about the “ick” your
market stews in day in and day out—how can you have them
experience or come face to face with that “ick” in a talk you
give? Would love to hear your thoughts below! And feel free
to share this post so others can get eavesdrop, too!

What’s the Key to a Stimulating Presentation?

Do you remember in English class, we were told to “show, don’t tell” when writing fiction? That’s because it’s boring to “tell.” Here’s a quick example of “telling: Bob was tired. He walked to the sofa and lay down. The room was too bright and he covered his eyes.

How would we write it if we were to show this same scene, not tell? Bob rubbed his eyes and yawned. He stood up and dragged his feet across the wooden floor into the living room, where he collapsed with a heavy sigh onto the sofa. Sunlight streamed relentlessly upon him and he threw an arm across his eyes. This is more interesting and taps our visual and even auditory senses. We are more engaged and intrigued —i.e. more attentive.

But this is not a post on writing, so what’s my point? My point is that “telling” in any format—writing or speaking—is boring! And when you’re speaking, your audience will lose interest if you “tell.” This is called the “pour and snore” technique!


Yet, do you know that 80% of
presenters I see “tell” almost
exclusively?
And 99.99% “tell”
far too often?

So, when you’re speaking, what’s the alternative to ‘telling’? Asking.

Here’s one of my firm mottos:  Whenever you would tell, ask a question instead.

Glance up three lines. Do you see that I asked a question–“Yet, do you know that…?” I could have made it a statement, couldn’t I?
Where I would have said, “80% of presenters I see…” But I asked a question. And look back in this paragraph. I posed two questions that most people would have made as statements. “Do you see that…?” would have been, typically, “Glance up three lines. You’ll see that I asked a question.” And rather than write, “I could have made it a statement, couldn’t I?most would have told instead: “I could have made it into a statement.”

Have you ever seen an Improv comedy show? One of the games is the Question Game. Two members begin: one asks a question, the other must answer with a question. The member who answers with a statement, or whose mind goes blank, goes to the back of the line, and the next troupe member plays against the winner. Obviously, the last member standing is the one who has succeeded in asking only questions all the way through. Kind of fun, isn’t it?

I would go so far as to say the speaker/presenter who asks questions all the way through his presentation will be the last one standing.

Even if you are a natural born question-asker—as coach or reporter or interviewer—it will still be challenging to take this on. We’ve been taught by our educational system that the person in front of the room knows everything and is there to “pour information” into us.

Despite hating the effect of “information download” when we’re in the audience, we tend to perpetuate it on stage because we haven’t been taught to ask questions.

How on earth can you ask questions all the time, you may ask? Well, can you envision one of your main teaching points and how you usually express it? Or a single statement you might make? What would it be like, turned into a question?  (Please note 4 questions in this paragraph.)

All right, let’s try an example, shall we? Say you’re
giving a presentation on the most advanced techni-
ques available for screwing in a light bulb. So, there you are and you’ve got a light bulb in one hand and a fake socket on a demonstration table next to you.
With me so far? A typical presenter would tell her audience how to insert the light bulb: “First, make sure all electricity has been turned off. Next, rattle
the light bulb to make sure it makes no sound—that means it’s new. Finally, make sure there is no water nearby.”

So, how boring is that?! Can’t you just imagine everyone in that audience nodding off? How can we turn it into a question-based presentation
instead?

Can you tell me what you think we’re going to be doing here today?”
Answer: “Screwing in a light bulb.”

“And for what reason?” Answer: “To make light.”

“Excellent. Before we screw it in, what are some safety precautions we should take?” They think of the water and turning off the electricity, but not ensuring that the light bulb is new. So, you shake the bulb and ask, “What do you think this might tell me?”

There you have a very brief example, but can you see what it does for the attentiveness of those in the group? The brain cannot abide an un-answered question. It’s like not answering a ringing phone. Your brain is compelled to answer.

Can you see that “telling” does not activate
the brain at all? It keeps it in a passive state—
which is the kiss of death for attentiveness,
comprehension and retention! Curiosity pro-
duces chemical reactions in the body that
directly stimulate learning and recall.

So, what’s the bad news for you? Well, you don’t get to show off every-thing you know when you’re asking questions—which can be a problem
for many experts, right? But that’s not what you’re there to do, is it?You’re there to enable the audience to see how much it knows.

So, what’s the motto you want to keep front and center when you’re delivering a presentation? Wherever you could tell, ask.

Got it? Do you promise to ask a LOT more questions? Do you think you already do? Let me assure you—you could almost never ask too many questions. Not if your goal is to stimulate a peak state of learning.

Join me tomorrow, April 7th at 7:30pm for my last free teleclass on “the new paradigm” of public speaking. Learn why it is we “tell” and don’t ask (it comes from an archaic cultural influence)–and find out what the other 3 influences are that destine you to be ineffective (and mediocre) with audiences. Read more and register here. It’s tomorrow!

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