A client asked me the other day how I came to have such conviction about my
purpose. It came on the heels of my having told her that, as a leader of change,
she needs to have “certainty” about that. That it’s her time now to move into
power and play much bigger. When she wrote me a couple of hours later, asking
me how I’d come to eb so certain, I had to think about it! I’d never had to “pull apart”
or articulate HOW it is that I know with such certainty that I am here to “activate”
the leaders and help them build successful one-of-a-kind business empires. Here’s
how I answered her:
Here are some contributing factors:
1. I am really in touch with my emotions; always have been, and I don’t like anything
that feels bad. That’s why I could never work for anyone else, because I hated it. I
couldn’t stay in a marriage that felt wrong, and am 10 years into a relationship that
feels great. There are downsides to only wanting what feels good: I tend to
procrastinate on anything that doesn’t feel good and am rather moody when
doing something I hate.
However, all of this fine-tuned awareness of my feelings has repelled career paths
that felt bad, and drawn me to those that feel good, and 25+ years of that kind of
intuitive “tacking” has brought me to a spot in my life where I’m doing what I love
and am good at because I only cultivated the skills that I really enjoyed. After all of
these years, sorting out good-feelings from bad-feelings, my intuition is a finely
honed and powerful tool in my arsenal and it has led to “I KNOW.” That kind of
certainty. I work with clients whose feelings aren’t that keenly felt, and so making
decisions can be very hard. And decisions are “certainties.” There is a great deal of
neuroscientific research that proves that if we can’t feel, we can’t decide. Read this
USA Today article here.
2. Honestly, another answer that comes to mind is that I’ve done my own work–
meaning, the work I take others through. I know so well my own convictions because
of those deep, penetrating questions. For instance, in The Powerhouse Method(TM),
clients must assert their *single* contention for their market–and this is a very large
step in revealing their purpose. Then, I have them excavate their “mountain top
message”–their leadership message, that is their message for humanity. It’s really a
big message. When they get this clear, they’re almost home to certainty. Then, we
craft their mission statement and determine their one-of-a-kind solution and after
all of this, they are convicted about their reason for being here. I did all of this for
myself, of course, and no one can walk out of that not KNOWING.
3. I also have the certainty I have because of my career history. I have spent years
developing my expertise–skills, again, that I am good. My conviction comes from
knowing my value to my market.
4. Additionally, I am madly in love with my market of service entrepreneurs here
to do big things in the world. Certainy comes from that and from knowing I’m a
perfect match for them.
5. And lastly (I guess, though I’m sure I’ll go to bed, thinking of more)…I bring my
beliefs into it all (part of what I do in the PHMethod for others), so I’m clear that I
believe this is a special time in history, and *the* time for service entrepreneurs to
move into roles of leadership during this historic transition. I am DEEPLY convicted
about that…and that reinfoces my certainty of my role to ensure they succeed.
So, in summary: I am so certain of my purpose because I know how to feel what is
wrong from right for me, by years of sorting out what feels good from bad. If you are
not sure of how you feel, this will be a problem. You will stay stuck in analysis
paralysis and waffle for years. I encourage everyone to start small and notice their
” body’s speak.” Notice what your body says when you’re looking at a menu filled
with choices. It is what tells you if you want chicken or fish. Pay attention to those
cues. Then, start to notice how it feels when you’re reaching for the phone to call
someone: does it *really* want to talk to that person, or are you just doing it from
habit? I am also so certain about my purpose because I know my message to my
market and my message to humanity; I know what my unique offering is; I am
passionate about a certain population and have beliefs about their purpose that fuel
my certainty about my own. I encourage everyone to find a population they’re in
love with, and to look into their beliefs about what that population is here for; doing
so will help cement their own purpose.
I am thankful for this client asking me this question, and I hope my answer was
helpful for all. Here’s to changing the world with your message!