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Do you remember in English class, we were told to “show, don’t tell” when writing fiction? That’s because it’s boring to “tell.” Here’s a quick example of “telling”: Bob was tired. He walked to the sofa and lay down. The room was too bright and he covered his eyes.

How would we write it if we were to show this same scene, not tell? Bob rubbed his eyes and yawned. He stood up and dragged his feet across the wooden floor into the living room, where he collapsed with a heavy sigh onto the sofa. Sunlight streamed relentlessly upon him and he threw an arm across his eyes. This is more interesting and taps our visual and even auditory senses. We are more engaged and intrigued —i.e. more attentive.

But this is not a post on writing, so what’s my point? My point is that “telling” in any format—writing or speaking—is boring! And when you’re speaking, your audience will lose interest if you “tell.” This is called the “pour and snore” technique!

Yet, do you know that 80% of
presenters I see “tell” almost
exclusively? And 99.99% “tell”
far too often?

So, when you’re speaking, what’s the alternative to ‘telling’? Asking.

Here’s one of my firm mottos:  Whenever you would tell, ask a question instead.

Glance up three lines. Do you see that I asked a question–“Yet, do you know that…?” I could have made it a statement, couldn’t I?
Where I would have said, “80% of presenters I see…” But I asked a question. And look back in this paragraph. I posed two questions that most people would have made as statements. “Do you see that…?” would have been, typically, “Glance up three lines. You’ll see that I asked a question.” And rather than write, “I could have made it a statement, couldn’t I?” most would have told instead: “I could have made it into a statement.”

Have you ever seen an Improv comedy show? One of the games is the Question Game. Two members begin: one asks a question, the other must answer with a question. The member who answers with a statement, or whose mind goes blank, goes to the back of the line, and the next troupe member plays against the winner. Obviously, the last member standing is the one who has succeeded in asking only questions all the way through. Kind of fun, isn’t it?

I would go so far as to say the speaker/presenter who asks questions all the way through his presentation will be the last one standing.

Even if you are a natural born question-asker—as coach or reporter or interviewer—it will still be challenging to take this on. We’ve been taught by our educational system that the person in front of the room knows everything and is there to “pour information” into us.

Despite hating the effect of “information download” when we’re in the audience, we tend to perpetuate it on stage because we haven’t been taught to ask questions.

How on earth can you ask questions all the time, you may ask? Well, can you envision one of your main teaching points and how you usually express it? Or a single statement you might make? What would it be like, turned into a question?  (Please note 4 questions in this paragraph.)

All right, let’s try an example, shall we? Say you’re
giving a presentation on the most advanced techni-
ques available for screwing in a light bulb. So, there you are and you’ve got a light bulb in one hand and a fake socket on a demonstration table next to you.
With me so far? A typical presenter would tell her audience how to insert the light bulb: “First, make sure all electricity has been turned off. Next, rattle
the light bulb to make sure it makes no sound—that means it’s new. Finally, make sure there is no water nearby.”

So, how boring is that?! Can’t you just imagine everyone in that audience nodding off? How can we turn it into a question-based presentation
instead?

“Can you tell me what you think we’re going to be doing here today?”
Answer: “Screwing in a light bulb.”

“And for what reason?” Answer: “To make light.”

“Excellent. Before we screw it in, what are some safety precautions we should take?” They think of the water and turning off the electricity, but not ensuring that the light bulb is new. So, you shake the bulb and ask, “What do you think this might tell me?”

There you have a very brief example, but can you see what it does for the attentiveness of those in the group? The brain cannot abide an un-answered question. It’s like not answering a ringing phone. Your brain is compelled to answer.

Can you see that “telling” does not activate
the brain at all? It keeps it in a passive state—
which is the kiss of death for attentiveness,
comprehension and retention! Curiosity pro-
duces chemical reactions in the body that
directly stimulate learning and recall.

So, what’s the bad news for you? Well, you don’t get to show off every-thing you know when you’re asking questions—which can be a problem
for many experts, right? But that’s not what you’re there to do, is it?You’re there to enable the audience to see how much it knows.

So, what’s the motto you want to keep front and center when you’re delivering a presentation? Wherever you could tell, ask.

Got it? Do you promise to ask a LOT more questions? Do you think you already do? Let me assure you—you could almost never ask too many questions. Not if your goal is to stimulate a peak state of learning.

Join me tomorrow, April 7th at 7:30pm for my last free teleclass on “the new paradigm” of public speaking. Learn why it is we “tell” and don’t ask (it comes from an archaic cultural influence)–and find out what the other 3 influences are that destine you to be ineffective (and mediocre) with audiences. Read more and register here. It’s tomorrow!